Saturday, November 19, 2005

Panic

Yesterday night something happened. I panicked and in a pretty major way.

I watched Harry Potter 4 at the TGV 1 Utama .. the 7.45 pm show ... I will review that flick later eh .. after the movie abis, I nak belah n then realized my wallet was gone ! .. cari la kejap at my seat .. tak jumpa .. panic set in .. tgk balik betul2 .. jumpa la wallet tersepit.. masa tu I was so bersyukur ...:-)

In fact, the shock didnt go away with the finding back of my wallet. I felt a bit dull .. hmm,... masa tu felt like going through the motions ...hmm. balik rumah .. tukar baju .. terus nak tido .. it felt odd. Suddenly, I felt empty inside and wished that someone was there to hug me and tell me that it's going to be alright. Woke up at 3 am .. felt better.. n then tido balik ..

Sometimes, at these moments .. it might be different situations for you, that we get an insight on what we are right now .. and to be honest, I was scared of what I felt. It was an empty feeling .... jeez, beneath all the layers that I put on.. am I a lonely soul , even though I tell myself that it's all okay ...

hmm ....

All The Way From New York - Wilson Phillips -

I’m gonna ask you for something, and it may sound like a lot.
I’ve never really asked you for anything, no.
We’ve always lived so far apart

Chorus:
Would you fly all the way from new york to see me?
Could you fly all the way to stand here next to me?
I didn’t think so
But here you are with me.

I was hanging on to nothing as a child.
And my brother, he used to slam into walls
Everyone called him wild
Yes it’s been a while since I’ve had a day,
Where I don’t wish away all the fear, all the fear
That’s why it’s so hard to ask

Thank you for coming.
You’ll never know what it means (ah..ah)
’cause no one ever cared enough about you
How were you supposed to know what I need
You’ll never know what it means
But thank you for coming.

hmmm.....

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

guess only those who've gone thru that could understand how lonely it can feel. well... it'll pass once in awhile. keep calling and hanging out with your best buddies... it'll help keep your mind off it although it may not go away entirely. at least, it helps. sometimes pun, layan je that loneliness until u rasa nak muntah and tak larat to layan anymore ;P

Azmir Ismail said...

Thank u. toughcookie ;-) .. glad to know someone understands ;-)